We have learned to trust each other. 10 patterns of verbal abuse. I couldn't agree more with this. My girlfriend and I (both teenagers) have been together for just under a year now, and whenever she is upset over something she goes practically silent. Explain that you cant resolve issues this way, then be specific about those issues. A better explanation is that we are both anxious introverts. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. I even said it once today. Let's explore 21 possible reasons why a girl might suddenly go silent on you. First story to suggest some successor to steam power? We haven't disagreed in a month, and she found a reason to bring up an insecurity from 6 months ago. And if she feels great chatting with you over text, she wont be able to wait to meet up with you in-person. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Need help on this situation, really don't want to bring him omg my space. Finally, (6): it's possible, even likely, that changes from (5) will not completely evade the issue indefinitely. P.S: She says that they didnt have anything and these guys called her just to talk because one of them was abandoned by a girl, and so that my girlfriend supported him and during which they started pushing her vodka but she drank one glass. And waiting. She's manipulating you and holding you emotionally hostage. Focus on your own feelings and needs, rather than her actions. If you're on the receiving end, you may feel frustrated and angry, so take a cooling-off period to get a breath and calm down. I could not attend as I was staying over at my parents place for the weekend. Women getting bored in a relationship is much more common than you probably think. Research shows that frequently feeling ostracized can reduce your self-esteem and sense of belonging. Your conversations need to shift from fresh to in depth.. Why did CJ Roberts apply the Fourteenth Amendment to Harvard, a private school? Silence in a relationship is often perceived as a red flag, but it isn't necessarily a bad thing. I'm also trying to sit in silence with her during times that I feel only mild anxiety. Kippert A. If that's the case, it probably has nothing to do with her not trusting you or rationally thinking that you will harm her, but is a symptom of her anxiety. I'm happy to sit around with her in the sun, cuddling, lying in bed and driving together. Test network transfer speeds with rsync from a server with limited storage, Comic about an AI that equips its robot soldiers with spears and swords. You might also benefit from individual or group counseling. Equivalent idiom for "When it rains in [a place], it drips in [another place]". All rights reserved. That covers (1) and (2). You already know what the no-contact rule is as well as the difference between radio silence and no contact. and our It happens. If we aren't together, we text often and I will ask her if something is on her mind and she will always say "I'm ok" or "I'm fine", even though I can tell that it's obviously not true. I listened, reflected, and reassured her. Effectively sitting in silence. Understanding Exactly Why Your Ex Is Silent After A Breakup Hence her silence. Its difficult to live that way, so you might be tempted to do everything you can to get back in their good graces, which perpetuates the cycle. She can do that on a date with you. Its coming from a place of punishment, not a need to cool off or regroup. I have it set to allow ringing/notifications sounds for my favorite contacts, which my wife and some other work contacts. Maybe she did but she's busy with work, study, or something else in the real world. If your girlfriend stops talking to you, it means that she no longer thinks that fighting is worthwhile. I think this is a demand-withdraw or pursue-withdraw cycle What is a demand-withraw pursue-withdraw cycle? You want her to experience positive emotions such as enthusiasm, curiosity, playfulness, passion, and get her laughing her ass off when she reads your texts. Reddit, Inc. 2023. Trying to Discuss the Relationship Via Text. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. If she did see the message and is waiting or choosing not to respond, your follow-up often reinforces that she shouldnt reply. By Chris Seiter Published on April 7th, 2021 Getting the silent treatment from your ex after a breakup sucks, especially when you don't know what it means and why they're doing it. I love her deeply and don't want to manipulate her in any way. The Surprising Truth About The Silent Treatment - Hey Sigmund I don't feel like she has cruel intentions, or is intentionally trying to hurt me in any way when she goes uber quiet. Suggest individual or couples counseling to work on the relationship and communication issues. How to install game with dependencies on Linux? But women dont want that over text its a horrible means for communication. Such a log might include information like when a silent spell began, how long it lasted, and your best ideas as to what may have caused it. Started Friday at 05:44 AM, My girlfriend of 2 months went radio silent on me at a meetup/party, 5 Secrets of Successful International Dating, The Charms of Courthouse Weddings (5 Must-Know Facts), Decode Your Marriage Years: 5 Interpretations, 5 Secret Elements of a Romantic Kiss (And How to Master Them), ENFP Compatibility Code: 5 Essential Insights (For Better Relationships), 7 Unique Ways to Infuse Love into Birthday Wishes. At first, it might be difficult to know for certain if youre dealing with a bigger problem. I dont know if anyone has had a similar experience to this, but I would really appreciate any advice. The truth, though, is that the dumper doesn't just need some fresh air. responding in anger, which can just escalate things, begging or pleading, which only encourages the behavior, apologizing just to put an end to it, even though you did nothing wrong, continuing to try reasoning with the other person after youve already given it a shot, taking it personally, as youre not to blame for how others choose to treat you, threatening to end the relationship unless youre prepared to do so, bouts of anger, fist-pounding, and throwing things, attempts to humiliate or embarrass you, particularly in front of others, making decisions for you without your permission, attempting to isolate you from family and friends, blaming you for all that goes wrong and never apologizing, threatening self-harm if you dont do what they want, making threats against you, people you care about, pets, or possessions. Reddit, Inc. 2023. Archived post. So I can't tell what the silence means, it could mean one of 1000 things. How can I deal with uncomfortable silence from my partner? Your girlfriend doesn't think texting is that important. For more information, please see our You will ultimately be balancing your girlfriend's preference to not talk with your preference for her to talk. Again this is a tool to help you understand when and how the silences arise so that you and your girlfriend can both be happier and more comfortable. 2. If youd like a more tailored approach to consistently sparking higher quality connections with women who genuinely want to get to know you, lets have a free, 100% confidential consultation call (up to 30 minutes) to discuss how we can work together. That is to say, it may not be an issue that is entirely derived from things she does, and solutions may require some amount of effort and/or discomfort on your part. Site design / logo 2023 Stack Exchange Inc; user contributions licensed under CC BY-SA. Sending a couple more playful messages will shift the vibe and make her feel more secure about your connection. She's Angry You've done something to anger her and now she doesn't want to talk to you anymore. But state that youd like to arrange a time to get together and resolve the problem. Here's a guide to identifying potential commitment issues and overcoming them. Privacy Policy. If one or both partners has stopped trying, thats a very bad sign.. Scan this QR code to download the app now. My girlfriend went silent on me after a did a joke on her. Can a joke When I ask why she wants to know what I think (her motivations), it's met with silence or defensiveness. Pause and Cool Down. You mistakenly think that by ignoring the other person and avoiding the situation, itll eventually blow over. FYI, these rules apply to both of you. "When their freedom and . Wrong. I do have some ideas of ways that you could talk to her about the situation, mostly based on what would work on me (also an anxious introvert, although on the more talkative side, generally). I can't give much specific guidance on this either, as it largely depends on how both of you regard these silences after discussing them and how many causes of the silences are unchangeable. This is primarily about what you feel, observe, and need, and about giving her the chance, not the requirement, to talk about her feelings and needs. Feel free to picture me in my wetsuit., So what inspired your bohemian-chic style? As far as I know, my classmate (B) loves my girlfriend and so often comes to visit her. -1 ImChubbs 1 yr. ago Yeah I have my ringer set to on, but use do not disturb. Her: lucky because my bank account is low. Maybe she is waiting to respond because its not her top priority in the moment. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Karakurt G, et al. Archived post. My phone is completely silent except for the exceptions that I specified. I also remember that nothing was more nerve-racking than waiting for a reply. For example, if you meet up after class or work, sit down to dinner, and find you have nothing to talk about, it can be a sign that youve lost your spark. If this is just the first time shes stopped responding, theres no point in playing the waiting game and potentially missing your window of opportunity. Then they go back to ignoring you or tell you sorry, but theyre not interested. When she gets nervous, she gets quiet, but she tends to want to stay in the same room. The Power Of Silence After The Break-up - Magnet of Success Tell me if this sounds familiar: Youre arguing, but youre not getting any closer to common ground. Or maybe she just became bored of the conversation. If not, it may be time to look for emotional support elsewhere. Tell the person how the silent treatment hurts and leaves you feeling frustrated and alone. Youre not responsible for their behavior, no matter what they tell you. Talking through the disagreement - this is a necessary step for her to start talking again. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! My Girlfriend goes practically silent when she is upset, won't tell me But if you do not see any improvement in her communication after six months, you need to consider walking away. By the same token, if you yourself have anxiety issues and ADHD which make silences difficult for you to bear, then it's very likely that, at least some of the time, you are responding to those silences based on those issues rather than anything your girlfriend meant to convey. And when she never replied at all realizing that our connection was potentially dead in the water.
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